احنا أسفين

بما أنه النهاردة أخر يوم مع ليلى و بما أنى تقريبا مكتبتش حاجة فى الموضوع ده .... حبيت أشارك كل بنى أدم شايف أن مفيش مشكلة لمرأة فى مجتمعنا بلحظة ظريفة جدا مريت بيها النهاردة ..... كنت واقفة على محطة الترام أنا و اتنين صحابى .... الترام بتتحرك قدامنا .... نزل منها واحد صفع صديقتى على مؤخرتها .... صاحبه بصق عليا .... و شتم الصديقة التالتة اللى ملحقش يلمسها أو يتف عليها ..... ------------------------------------------------- صحبتى اللى اتضربت وقفت تضحك , سالتها : ايه بيضحك فى ده ؟؟ قالت لى : عشان معيطش ..... طبعا كان نفسى توافق أحط صورتها هنا بس هى عمرها ما ح ترضى ..... عشان هى بتستحرم تتصور أصلا ... عشان هى كبنت شايفه أنها مش س لازم تكون مغطية جسمها كله و بس ... لا دى بترفض تتصور كمان ..... يعنى عملت اللى عليها و منعت اثارةلفتنة الرجل .... ليه محدش منع نفسه عن أذيتها ؟؟؟؟؟ ..... ----------------------------------------------------- لما ركبنا الترام اللى وراها قعدنا لمدة نص ساعة كاملة بنحكى مواقف مشابهة ........... صديقتى المصفوعة و التانية المشتومة قعدوا يحكوا فى سيل من المواقف اللى حصل لهم ... تقريبا بشكل يومى لازم نسمع تعليقات غاية فى البذاءة ... و بشكل لحظى لازم نشوف نظرات متعدية ..... و بشكل شهرى لازم نتعرض للاعتداء باللمس ؟؟؟ .... ------------------------------------------------ زعلانه أوى و أنا بحكى ده ... محدش ممكن يحس قد ايه أنا زعلانه مهما قال أنه عارف ..... حتى لو بنت , لان ليا احلام كبيرة ممكن يقف قدامها تحولى التدريجى للامتناع عن النزول فى الشارع تماما ....... و ساعتها مش ح ألاقى حاجة اكتبها و لا اقولهالكوا هنا ....... ليه زعلانة ؟؟ لأنى بحب أمشى فى الشارع أوى .. بحب أتأمل الناس أوى .... عشان كده مش بفضل أركب عربية أو تاكسى .... بحب أمشى وسط الناس ... طبيعة المهنة اللى بحاول أمارسها بتتطلب ده ... شخصيتى بتحب ده .... الا انى الفترة الأخيرة بطلت امشى خالص ..... بخاف .... لانى مش بسكت ... و مش معقول ح تخانق كل يومين .... طب أعمل ايه ؟؟ تقوقعت من غير ما أقصد على نفسى .......... ----------------------------------- مش بجب أشتكى , على طريقة اشرب بيرل كده هههههههه , عشان كده ليا مغامرات فى الرد على الأشكال دى و اللى ولا مرة جاب نتيجة ..... و اللى عتق الولد ده من ايدى المرة دى أن كان فى ترام بتجرى ... صديقتى المصفوعة قالت لى بعد الموقف : ياريتنى كنت سمعت كلامك و خدت تاكسى ......... ----------------------------------------------------- صح البنات معندهمش مشكلة خالص .... احنا زى الفل ... مية مية و كل بنى ادم بقى بيقول كده يعرف أنى ح أجيبه و أسلط عليه ناس يتحرشوا بيه هههههه عشان اللى ايده فى المية ... ---------------------------- طب أنا عايزه حل ... انا واحدة مش بستسلم و ح أخد حقى أهو .. قلولولى حل غير أنى أجيب العيال دى من قفاها و احاول أفعصهم ... لأنى اريدى بعمل ده ... و الحمد لله كل محاولات الرد كانت فاشلة جدا ....... ------------------------------------------------ هو احنا سبب كل المشاكل , أوكيه و احنا اللى عاملين كده فى روحنا .... صح و احنا اللى قلنا للناس تحرشوا بينا ......... ممكن برده بس عايزه اجابة محترمة كده رجاء من كل شخص ناوى يعلق يرد علي السؤال ده ....... حد فيكوا كان ماشى فى الشارع و جرب يتصفع على مؤخرته قبل كده ؟؟؟ ----------------------------- تصبحوا على مكان متمشوش فيه تبصوا وراكوا ........... ملحوظة : بوجه تحية للصديقة المدونة ماجى اللى قالت لى ح تبطلى تتكلمى فى الموضوع شوية ... و مش ح تقدرى و ترجعى تانى ههههههههه

مش مهم اذا كنا كلنا ليلى ولا لأ

الصراحة كنت ناويه أفكس السنة دى موضوع كلنا ليلى .... أنا كتبت فيه السنة اللى فاتت و لأنى

اتغيرت كتير عن السنة اللى فاتت كنت ناويه أفكس

بس مياسى جت هنا و قالت لى و ماجى ادينى كلمتين فى العضم هههههههه , فقلت خلاص ... توكلنا على الله .

و ايه فايدته ؟؟ طب أنا ح أقعد أحرق فى دمى و أتناقش و اجادل و فى الأخر ألاقى كائنات أميبية (جايه من أميبه يعنى أى طفيلى ) بيقولى كلام غبى أوى لا يتناسب مع العصر اللى احنا فيه خالص ..معلش ما هى مدونتى و أكلم براحتى مرة من نفسى يعنى ... و مفيش مرة وصلت بالجدال فى حاجة بالذات فى الموضوع ده .... و بعدين قعدت أسأل برده اشمعنى قدرت اقنع الناس بأفكار غريبة كتير و مش عارفه فى ده ؟ و ولا غيرى عارف و اكتشفت برده ان المشكلة فى القالب ... فى حاجات معينة ممكن الناس تاخد وتدى فيها و حاجات تانية بيتولدوا من هنا و بيركب لها القالب من هنا ... منها الكتالوج بتاع الأنثى فى حياتهم .... بطلت اتكلم فى الموضوع ده لأن مش من انصار الشكوى , يعنى اللى بياخد حقى منى وبسكتله يبقى الغلط عندى .... و انا كسارة مش حاسه انى درجة تانية فى حاجة ... بس أبقى كدابة لو قلت أنى كبنت فى المجتمع ده مش حاسه بحاجة .... كفاية أن الواحد بيمشى فى الشارع يتلفت وراه ... دى تسوى كتير بس مش وقتها خالص .... أنا على فكرة مكنتش مرتبة أنى ح اقول اللى فات ده و اللى عارفه أنه مالوش دعوة ببعضه بس أهو كلام ورا بعضه و خلاص ...

نخش بقى فى اللى كنت مرتبه أقوله ..

كنت مرة قاعدة فى لقاء ثقافى محترم جدا , مع ناس بحبهم و بقدرهم جدا , و كنا بناقش حاجة ليها دعوة بأزمة الزواج ... و جه اتنين ولاد باعتبرهم لهذه اللحظة أصدقائى و بحترمهم جدا ... و هم ناس مثقفين بمعنى الكلمة و فيهم واحد وعيه فوق سنه بعشر مرات ........ كان فى واحد من اللى قاعدين بينفى أن يكون دافع الشباب للزواج جنسى بحت لأنهم ممكن يحققوا ده بطرق غير شرعية بعيدا عن الزواج ( بيدافع عن الولاد اهو مقلش حاجة الراجل ) و قام صديقى المثقف قال : يعنى تشترى اللبن و لا تجيب الجاموسة أحسن ؟؟؟ .

رد عليه صديقى التانى اللى برده مثقف و بحترمه و مزعلتش منه برده و قاله :فعلا , يعنى تشترى تذكرة و لا تركب التروماى .....

كان فى التشبيه هنا " الزوجة هى الجاموسة و التروماى " .

الغريب أن الاتنين من أنصار التدقيق المبالغ فيه فى استخدام المصطلحات و الألفاظ و الكلام ... مش بيسبوها تطلع بالله كده ..... يوميها أنا معلقتش .... و لما سالتنى واحدة صاحبتى مندهشه لانى سكت على غير عادتى , قلتلها : لما بدافع فى موضوع زى ده ... ح يحطوا عليا علامة أنى بتاعت حقوق مرأة و معقدة و ساعتها كل ما أحاول أتكلم فى أى موضوع تانى فى الدنيا مش ح يجيب معاهم نتيجة ... لانى ح أبقى عليا علامة معينة ...

معرفش انتوا فهمتونى و لا لأ ؟؟ بس أنا مضايقه من نفسى بسبب تفكيرى ده ... أنا زهقت من الكلام ... و اخترت أركز مع نفسى .... يمكن أنا غلط .... مش عارفه ... و لذلك مش لاقيه حاجة دلوقتى أقولها لأى واحدة شايفه نفسها أنها ليلى ...غير حاجة واحدة اطلعى من ده فى حياتك الشخصية عشان تعرفى تدى للفكرة على مستوى أعلى من غير ما تسحبى عقدك الشخصية معاكى ......... تصالحى مع نفسك أنتى و اجبرى الاخرين على ده ..... و بعدين نبقى نشوف أزمة المجتمع ككل ... كفاية عليكوا كده ..... تصبحوا على خير ... او تصبحوا على مجتمع مفهوش حد درجة تانية سواء كان ست , راجل أو حتى جاموسة ........ ههههههههه

اكتشاف

اكتشفت امبارح اكتشاف رهيب جدا ....... اكتشفت أنى بكتب عشان أعرف نفسى .... و انى بكتب عشان أتحقق ... و أنى بكتب عشان برده ... معرفش الصراحة ليه برده . و أهم من كل ده اكتشفت أنى مبكتبش كتير .. تصبحوا على خير

stuck

He had never tried to use public toilets before . Not because they are too filthy for him to use , but public toilets were not widely spread from the first place. He used to urinate following the traditional way, open his zipper and facing a wall or a fence of a garden . Although , he did not like peeing this way , being used to something strips it from any feelings of dislike.

Working as a velant in a primary school , he walked everyday in the early morning to the bus stop and jumped into the one heading downtown . Afterwards, he would wait for a microbus to drive him along the narrow streets to the school. His journey to work usually takes an hour . Suffering from liver and bladder problems , Saber needed to pee every couple of hours . He could wait till he reaches school, but the problem was that his mate " Om Mostafa " had the key of the only men's toilet in school and because of the little favours om mostafa paid to the school headmaster , she was the only employee who dared to come at 11 pm though teachers were not allowed to enter school after 9 pm . That's why he used to pee in a garden nearby before he enters school .

He got to know the public toilet when he could not find the microbus one day and had to walk all way to school. Saber tried to school . Saber tried to get in it but the doorway was blocked by three men . The three men lined up in a queue and Saber managed to press himself into a small square where people were standing . The smell was too disgusting to describe . Ugly paintings covered the walls . All ceramic tiles were cracked as if they were hit by a hard object , harder than the tiles themselves . The upper part of the door of the toilet cabin was broken but still it prevented others from seeing the person inside . The first man in the queue was shouting of pain and he pressed his both hands on his stomach hoping to relieve the pain . The one behind him was his friend who explained to the others the reason why he could not stop whining . It was a poisoned liver sandwich from Abdo Swarekh , the famous oriental sandwiches shop downtown . On hearing this , Saber took out a beans sandwich from the large side pocket of his shirt and stared for few seconds at it . "Beans are just beans " said Saber ti himself who was pretty sure that after thirty – five years of eating sandwiches daily that he can never fall ill because of them.

Infront of Saber , there was a dreadfully thin Youngman whose elbow joints were visible from under his skin. He made some facial expressions that made him seem abnormal . He was not comfortable to be approached or even stared at .

Ten minutes passed while Saber was waiting for the anonymous man who was in the toilet cabin . The whinning man knocked hard on the door and his bearded friend threatened to break it if the person inside did not get out immediately . There were all sure of that . There was something strange going on inside they were all sure of that .

They could see from the opening at the bottom of the door that was on the floor . They saw one leg stretching on the dirty cracked ceramic tiles . The bearded man's threats served them right . After few seconds , the person inside the cabin opened the door slowly , gazed at them all , said nothing and crawled his way out of the place . He was slim and recognizably short . His eyes were red and his face was frozen and gave no reactions. The moment he opened the door , the whining man ran inside and slammed it .

The bearded man said satirically : " What 's wrong with him ? " The whining friend said from inside : " He was taking drugs , the remains of hashish are everywhere on the ground. The bearded man got angry and kept condemning lack of morals and the down fall of religious behaviours. Saber did not understand why the bearded man was that angry . Saber knew plenty of good people who smoked Hashish. He , himself , amoked hashish in feasts and wedding parties. The whining man pushed a quarter pound that was thrown on the floor with his leg to the men standing outside to prove his point .

The bony guy soon rushed to the banknote that was covered with a black sticky substance and picked it up . He peeped out at the other two men , threw himself at one of the narrow ony guy soon rushed to the banknote that was covered with a black stickycorners , took out a cigarette lighter and lighted the banknote after rolling it like a cigarette

The bearded guy furiously said " You will not smoke hashish here , you … " He started insulting the bony man and was about to punch him on the face when Saber middled between them and tried to screen the youngman who threw the banknote on the floor as he felt a little afraid of the well built bearded man and started insulting him back .Then a moment of silence when they heard ElAdan from a mosque near by. After that the bearded man broke this silence by a question to his friend inside the cabin " How is everything now , Do you feel better ?" . The man who had already stopped whining few minutes ago : " A little bit , but still feeling the pain " . Saber began to run out of patience but he said nothing.

They were all stuck in 2 x 2 m space , each of them leaned on one corner . After a while , a little girl stepped in from the narrow entrance with a young child in her hand . She seemed dumfounded on the sight of the sight of the three men who were stuck in such a narrow place . She stood next to them silently , Saber startled when he saw that the girl dared to step in the toilet and wait them . He said addressing her " Go out girl , this toilet is for men only " . She was only a twelve year old girl in a dark old " galabyia" and a tiny veil that exposed most of her brownish hair rather than covered it . She had this skin colour that distinguished most suburbans who belonged to the lower class of the working class , this dusty coloured skin with layers of accumulated dirts over her face . The way in which she answered Saber showed that

she was probably one of those girls who sold vegetables and fruit in the market nearby

It was quite daring to tell Saber : "I do not see any men here" . As many men would respond to that , Saber and the bearded man flew into rage , the latter said : "what ? Hold your tongue girl , go out or we will get you out by force " . The girl said in a loud voice using her hands which moved in all directions expressing her fury : " I do not see (Banned for females ) sign written outside , besides you should be ashamed of yourselves , you can do it anywhere , women are more entitled to it than you " .

The girl looked very wild this made Saber and the bearded man end their quarrel at this point . Minutes passed , the girl stood with the little child in one of the narrow corners , next to her directly was the bearded man . The bony young man had to lean on the toilet cabin's door inspite of the whining man's requests to go away as the door was very weak and tended be broken easily . Saber looked at his watch , he still had 15 minutes , meanwhile , the bony man was staring at the ceiling singing in a strange language that was what Saber thought " a strange language " . However ,he soon realized that the young man is definitely a lunatic and that he was

just producing sounds that were meaningless

Both men were absent minded for few minutes . At this time , the bearded man was peeping out at the little girl and inspecting her with keen eyes . She noticed hi looks and felt uncomfortable . She moved herself inches away from him . She wanted to move for a more distance , but there were no more inches . The place was as tiny as a box of matches. The bearded man approached again . He gave the little child a chewing gum . The girl stood still and said nothing . Then , the bearded man leaned a little bit with his body over her shoulders and was about to touch her from the back with his hand when the girl screamed , took off one slipper her feet and flung them at his face , damning him and all men in the world . Saber was shocked when he heard the scream , he had given them his back and did not see what happened , the bony man stopped singing . Saber tried to middle between them and asked the girl :"what's going on ? " She did not answer him but took the other slipper , threw it at Saber's face and ran out bare footed grabbing the child from his arm . The bearded man said angrily :" The girl is a whore , it is very obvious , she got into a men's toilet and accused our masculinity , she is a whore and wanted us to respond to her . Oh ! God strengthen our faith " . Saber looked at him with no doubt that the man was sincere about what he said . Yes , the girl was definitely a whore . At this moment , the cabin's door opened and the whining man looked in pain but he was much better . The bearded man rushed to the toilet cabin and shut it quickly as if he was hiding himself . The bony guy became angry and shouted claiming that he was there before them . He unzipped his pants and urinated all over the floor with a wide victorious smile upon his face . The young man urinated a lot on the walls and the floor . The chaotic urination made the place smell worse and look dirtier than before . The whining man said to him " Are you out of your mind ? " He turned to Saber and said : " He must be a lunatic , right ? " . Saber nodded , he checked that his sandwich was still in his pocket and left the tiny place ,where one man was shouting and the other bursting into urine chaotically .

It is not a wise thing to leave a man who is so desperately in need of toilet waiting for a longtime . Anyway , the young man is a little mad , but Saber is a sane one . He told himself that his bladder could wait another few minutes till he reaches school. "I have been waiting for a long time , I can bear a bit longer and continue waiting " said Saber to himself . . . .